Shenanigans and Fuckery With Animals
I usually don't blog a lot about news stories but this is eating at me big time.
The story of the "pet" chimp ripping this poor woman's face off. Christ on a cracker. The woman has no eyes, no nose, no face essentially. The image alone is enough to give me nightmares for WEEKS. A crazed monkey going postal? Won't die from being stabbed and has to eventually get capped by the po-po? That is some scary, disturbing shit. And I'm an animal lover! This almost had me giving my cats the side-eye and usually I'm only suspicious of children!
Also, the back story on the relationship between the chimp and it's owner is some sick shit. I haven't followed the story obsessively but all I know thus far is the following:
*This woman would take BATHS with the chimp and he would comb her hair
*She fed him expensive filet mignon steaks and lobster AND gave him alcoholic beverages
*She bought him clothes and he had a wardrobe
*She and the chimp "exchanged gifts"
Ummm, I wanna say out loud what everyone else is thinking...
WERE THESE TWO FUCKING?
Like really, I wanna know. Was she getting monkey peen, yes or no goddammit.
She treated this monkey like he was her man!
Wow...just wow.
Although I treat my two little feline kids very well, it has never and WILL NEVER reach this magnitude.
They get lots of affection and belly rubs. They get plenty of cat nip so they can go crazy and sniff lines of it off each other's stomachs and get high and wild, they eat organic cat food with no meat by products, they are allowed to sleep in the bed with me and um that's pretty much it. They don't get meals cooked for them, I would never dream of putting clothes on them, they don't get shit for Christmas, we don't celebrate their birthdays...and we definitely don't take baths together. And we don't kiss on the lips like I'm willing to bet this woman and her monkey did! Ewww I bet they used tongue! Blahhh! I could hurl just thinking about that.
Anyway, can you imagine me cooking my felines a porterhouse, pouring Pinot Grigio into their water dish and then running us all a bubble bath? GTFOH!!!
Check my crazy ass into an institution if I ever pull that kind of fuckery.
Mahogany Misfit - Thursday, February 19, 2009 at 07:32PM - 11 said something... - filed under WTF? Email Article 
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Reader Comments (11)
Lmao yeah that is just sick!
I'm more disturbed by the part about her medicating the chimp...which ultimately may have been why he flipped the hell out and tore that other woman apart...
Yes, with the Xanax? My shrink advised me against that stuff years ago because she says it can make you violent and aggressive! That could definitely be a factor in this...SMH
I still can't wrap my mind around this crazy ass relationship.
wtf!!!!!!!
this is the first time i'm hearing about the details.
taking baths with the chimp?
well, the chimp prolly thought the chick was trying to beat his time or something???
OKKKKKKKKKK that was not funny. sorry :)
I read some stuff online about this and how "close" they were and how she loved him so much and they were joined at the hip. I think the answer to your question is yes, it's a safe bet she was humping the monkey. She was getting "monkey peen' as you put it LOLOL.
Wow @ the whole post....just wow
I had not heard the details. I know that the chimp was some sort of celebrity, so he had to be well taken care of...but sharing baths and wine? WTF!?
Yeah, well........... errrrrr ahhhhhhhh...........I got nothin..........lol
OMG- Monkey Peen! LMFAO!! Woooo remember when you couldn't find anyone to watch the girls and you were just going to dump all their cat food on the floor? LMAO yea I can't really see you bathing with them...
SPEECHLESS! LMAO @ "monkey peen"